First Impressions:

~*~Username and Title: I'm sorry, did you miss the day in school when they taught spelling? It's "cries". Duh. I learned that in abou the fourth grade. What a morbid concept. Please not another depressed, oh-my-life-is-so-hard teen. Your title makes no sense to me. No one is ever better off alone. Do you know what you're saying? I hate it. Ahem.

The username is stupid. It might as well have numbers in it. You can't even spell "cries" right! It's cries, not crys! "Crys" looks like the short form of a really long disease or something. I like the title, and agree with it, however. But then again, I'm in a better mood than Amara at the moment.-2/5

~*~Thoughts While The Page Was Loading: I hate people that don't follow the rules, honestly. Does it take so long to just read them? I'm in such an awful mood…does not bode well for this diarist. EW! That's so…well…ugly.

All right, Amara. How much are you willing to bet that this one is a wannabe "Goth" cutter? I'm putting down five. Ew! What the hell is with her links?-1/5

The Starlit-Lily Factor:

~*~Does Your Soul Shine Through? Let's see. No. Unless you really are a thirteen-year-old girl who's annoying as all fuck. You try to be so cutesy and yet morbid and depressing at the same time. God, you act so immature. I really, really hope that I wasn't ever like that. Maybe that is your soul though – and if it is, how I pity you, darling. However, you're right, you can't help it if you bug people. And you do bug me.

Yes, and I find myself wishing I could bear to squash it like I would squash a slug. Violently, and then followed by salt. Have you ever salted a slug? If I could, I would do that to you. You abuse yourself to "relieve emotional stress". I have yet to understand how creating more pain RELIEVES pain. No, instead you abuse yourself, and call yourself a vampire because you drink blood. You think you're so big and bad and tough, and yet you would probably scream if a spider jumped out in front of you. You're an attention whore. Normally I say that affectionately, but with you, it's with disgust. You do the most negative things possible in order to get some attention. You're not even an especially sensitive person. The emotional stress you claim to have is very likely created by you, just for the drama. It's girls like you that make the world think teenage girls are vicious, catty, petty and overdramatic.

I really must agree with Amara. You can't help it if you're annoying. And you annoy me twice as much as you do her--because I'm a Gemini. And that's two minds you're aggravating. Are you scared yet?-17/35

~*~Are You Observant Of Beauty? No. Nope. Non. You are so…obsessed with yourself. I'm going to bop you on the head once I figure out a way to do it over the Internet. "Waaah, waaah, waah, life is so hard for me!" Get a clue – no one's got a perfect life. When you're not doing that, you're daylogging – yawn. I don't know who any of these people are, and frankly, I don't care.

No. A walrus belching at his Sea World trainer is more observant of beauty. You aren't even observant of dark beauty. Amara, darling, do you know where that salt is?-10/35

Layout:

I need a thesaurus. I don't know enough horrible words to describe this layout. It's definitely one of the ugliest ones I've ever seen. I know it's self-designed, but, honey, stick to taking other people's designs until you really have a good hold of HTML. It all just looks slapped together on there. It looks like some sort of collage I might have made in the second grade. Strike that, in preschool. The picture of the girl is pretty, I have to admit. But it's so…elementary. Your links are awful. And why slap a tagboard on the main page? All it does is detract from the design. Visit Beautify, hon. Oh, dear lord, there's music. That's as tacky as some weird cursor that spells out words. How disgusting. I'm turning my speakers off. Yuck.

I wasn't especially wild about the picture on the entry page. I found the colors a bit dreary, but the font is readable. However, the random presence of blue bothers me. It seems like red would suit it better. But then I saw the links, which I will discuss later. And all of a sudden, Winamp froze up, and Avril Lavigne--a bad radioesque version--started playing. And I started wanting to murder you. So I went to the Archives page to escape. And then I wanted to plot a highly creative murder for you. Something along the lines of impaling you with ten thousand matches and then lighting one...and seeing what happens. Why? Because not only was there music on the Archives page, it was a different song, and a different layout altogether! No, no, no and no! The two don't match--it's like you wore navy shoes with an otherwise all-black ensemble! And the music--oh, Goddess. I hate you. Oh, and one more thing. Amara, should we start a class for new diarists instructing them on the ugliness of Tagboards and Chatterboxes on the main pages of their layouts?-6/20

Navigation:

Um. Well, number one, some of your links are broken. Might want to fix that. Number two, you obviously didn't close a code tag because it's pretty screwed up. It's ugly, in Times New Roman font, which no one uses anymore. And it's strikethrough when clicked on. Is it just me, Cielamara, or is this one of the worst navigation types you've seen in a while?

It's there. Not spectacular. I'm not wild about it. You've got an error on the main page, as well as on the Archives page. Your HTML for your link to your poetry bleeds into the link to Diaryland. Seriously, why don't you just go steal a layout from someone else?-2/10

Content:

~*~Your Content: You really better hope they don't find a way to murder over the Internet. Because if they do... You…you posted an IM conversation!!! Who does that? Have you lost your mind? Do you think I have the patience to read through that thing? IM is a big no-no in the diary world.

I read slightly less than Amara did, apparently, as I'm not actively searching for the bamboo slivers to jam under your fingernails, as I believe she is. I read most of your entries, however. That being said...

You write like you're ten. For all I know, you are. You alternate between being a preppy, cute cheerleader and being a depressing, tormented teenager. Too bad for you, you picked the stereotypes I hate more than anything in the world. Not only that, you don't have a cast page. You write about these people in your life – and I have no idea who they are! I just stare at the screen and nothing is coming to mind. You're not stimulating. You're so boring. I'm going to fall asleep. I have no compassion for you whatsover.

The "preppy cute cheerleader" that has so incensed Amara really didn't bother me as much. Rather, it was a nice change from the histrionic, melodramatic, problem-causing child that is prevalent in your diary. Yes, that little sweetheart who drinks blood and calls herself a Wiccan. Darling, do you know what Wicca is about? Do you even know who founded it? Have you been initiated? Who is your teacher? Oh, let me guess. You initiated yourself.. You don't need a teacher. Do you know anything about Paganism, and how it can affect your life? Wicca is a serious religion which does not advocate self-harm. "An it harm none, do what ye will"includes yourself. You can't even spell "goddess" correctly. You are a wannabe. Worse than a wannabe, you're a self-destructive wannabe who thinks it's cool to cut. You're also a sexaholic. Why don't you combine the two and do yourself with your razorblade? With any luck, you'll either die or you'll render yourself unable to reproduce any monsters like you.

Shall we talk about the ellipses? Yes, the "…"'s that overcrowd your diary like a fishbowl where a guppy has just given birth. Don't use them so often! Here's an idea – start a new sentence instead!

Your writing style is awful. Your poetry, as Amara will discuss in a moment, is decent, but the rest of your diary is horrid. You write like a child. Or like someone who is too hell-bent on destroying her mind and her body to care how much bad karma she's accumulating. My advice? Use proper grammar and spelling. Don't update unless you really have something to talk about. Don't write when you're drunk or stoned. It will make a world of difference.

Okay, do you see this entry? I'm going to commit suicide. I would rather jump into a cold river filled with piranhas naked than read this kind of garbage. I swear, I can actually feel myself getting stupider as I read each word.

Hmm. "I wanna be a person, its odd, i dont feel i am one." Wow, I totally understand that! It's like, uh, you aren't one!

Why are you so proud of doing things like this? I understand, you're drunk, you do crazy things. But – what the hell? I'm disgusted that you're excited about the fact that you gave a blow job to a gay guy and tried to have sex with another. I don't really care if you do. I just care that I have to read about it.

Okay. I don't really care what you do either. It's your life, your body, if you want to screw it up, go ahead. If you want everyone to see you as nothing more than a free vagina, go ahead. But, honestly, if you're going to request a review, don't do it for a diary that's filled with so much garbage and bragging--is any of that true? Goddess help you if it is--that we wish that this person was YOU instead. It sounds like something you'd do.

Oh, GOD. Another CUTTER! I'm sorry, but I can't stand people who sign online to write line after line about how good the razor feels against their skin. They bug me. You bug me. Basically, you invent problems for yourself. So what, your friend told you that you ate too much? Why should she care? Don't make life any harder than it already is, believe me on that one.

Cielamara's wise expression of the day: Do. Not. Listen. To. Other. People's. Crap.
That being said, your poetry is not horrible. It could use some work, but it was probably the only thing I could read in your diary without wanting to throw myself in front of a train going 200mph.

Basically, overall – probably the worst diary I've had to review since I've been here. You made a biiiiig mistake in requesting, honey. Not a good idea.

I didn't fully hate you when I started off reviewing you, but when I found out that you call yourself Wiccan, and probably don't know anything about the faith, I started hating you more than I believe I've ever hated a diarist. Fake faith is never attractive, darling. Now, don't you have traffic in which you can go play?-15/70.

~*~Your Grammar and Spelling:Well. You don’t capitalize. You can't spell worth a dime. Your punctuation makes me sick. Basically, I hate you with the fire of a thousand suns and there's no way I'll give you points in this section. Actually, no. I'll give you a point for speaking semi-distinguishable English.
Wow, Amara's being the nice one here. I'm giving you negative points because you pissed me off.
-2/10.

Extras:

Nothing. You have a link to your poetry which doesn't work. I'll give you the benefit of the doubt. But that's it.

How sad! Most people get these points. They're our freebie points.-1/10.

Will I Return?

Honestly? You are the reason reviewers go insane. I want to smash my screen with a baseball bat, I hate you that much.

Ha. Ha. HAHAHAHAHA. Erm. Sorry. HAHAHA.

Comments:

Excuse me while I barf.

Excuse me while I try to control my hysterical laughter.

Total:53/200.

Fade - Glow

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~*~Recently Reviewed Lilies~*~
Hiatus - August 02, 2004
Another Note From The Lilies - July 15, 2004
A Second Note From The Lilies - July 01, 2004
False-apathy's Review - June 08, 2004
A Note From The Lilies - May 12, 2004